Thursday, January 28, 2010

PriceRite and Jack Frost

I am ever so thankful for the woman who stopped to let me out of the PriceRite parking lot this evening. She took the time to be courteous even amoungst all the other Rochestarians who were driving home in the blizzard.  I would however, like to say something to the umpteen 4 wheel drive trucks who drove past me.

I understand that you are very busy, and that your day at work was very long and stressful. I know that you cannot wait to get home to play on your wii, or eat your gourmet dinner, or stand on your head and eat ice cream. I know that you are a busy in demand being, and that your life matters.  This however, does not give you the divine right to make your own driving lane on a 2 lane road amidst a blizzard.
What I would like to say to you, is that my life also matters.  After all, I was also planning to go home and eat some soup and obsess over my facebook until my eyes were teary.  For that very fact there are really only 2 possible excuses I will accept for putting my life and the lives of everyone else in danger.

Excuse number 1:
Your wife is in labor and also laying across the backseat of said 4 wheel drive vehicle. If you do not make your own personal lane of traffic, she will not make it to the hospital in time.  You have no medical training whatsoever, and so that makes you the most inadequate midwife ,especially while operating a vehicle. You must reach the hospital before she is 10 cm dialated and she is now at 9.5.
You sir, are excused.

Excuse number 2:
Your sainted 92 year old grandmother is laying on her deathbed just a few minutes from Jesus, and she is holding on to this life to tell you the secrets of life. 
You sir, are also excused.

To the rest of you; Shame.  You should know better.

Thank you for listening, and in the future please remember; This is Rochester. You have absolutely no reason to drive irresponsibly in the snow. 

And now, once again, I would like to thank the sweet woman in the tiny car who let me out of a parking lot, even though the traffic was bumper to bumper.
I also would like give an honorable mention to the cop who gave me grace while passing through a yellow light that may or may not have turned red mid-turn. 

Friday, January 22, 2010

Cheese stick musings

Sometimes I look at myself and wonder if I am the "me"  I want to be.  All the things I say I'm passionate about,do they truly describe me? Am I an exact representation of who I say I am?  Of course I know no one can be.  We are all so complex.  But I wonder sometimes, when someone reads my profile page who comes into thier minds. I hope I live up to all I believe in.
Its like that old saying, wanting to be the person your dog thinks you are.
For instance:

I'm quiet, and shy.  Doesn't make you think of an actor.  But that's ok. I am both.

I'm a country girl who lives in the city. And I love both.

I'm single, but plan to adopt. I can be a family.

I'm a Christian, but get so frustrated with "religion".  Yet my faith is real.

I love my family to death and miss them so much when I'm away. But moving away again would be acceptable at the right time.

I'm a thinker and a dreamer, but sometimes I feel so shallow.

I feel so inadequate sometimes, and others I feel like I could conquer the world.

I think its wrong to sit quietly when you could make a difference or speak up.  And sometimes that gets me into trouble.

I was reminded yesterday of a powerful quote.  It's a scripture actually.  I had forgotten it, but it's so powerful.

Romans 8:31
31What shall we then say to these things? If God be for us, who can be against us?

I can do all things, I can survive and thrive, because I have a God who loves me, that I am getting to know daily on a more personal basis.  He totally has my back. 

If HE loves me, who can come against him? 

Monday, January 11, 2010

To the bachelor......Um, HELLLLO?!!!???!!!!!

I'm about to vent, so bear with me for this one....
So I just finished watching the Bachelor and am just so struck by a few things.
  Number 1: Above all, love is not a game.  It's like watching a train wreck seeing all those people fluff like peacocks, and saying they're looking for "love", when most of them obviously don't even know Love.  Just breaks my heart.

Love is patient. Kind. It doesn't seek its own.  It's not rude, or self seeking, It's not jealous.  And, it is also not simply, or solely an emotion.

True love is a miracle. It's so rare now a days to wait for that miracle, that most people settle for so much less, simply because they have never seen it to recognize it.
It's like thinking for your entire life that broth is delicous and filling, when you've never even had the stew.  Once you do, there's no turning back. There's just no comparison.
Ok, I know, very bad illiteration, but you get the idea.
Theres so much more to love than made up beauty, lust, and a fun date.  That's so empty. Really.

What now becomes so hard for me is, now that I know what love is really like, there is no way I can settle for less.
And, if you're like me, and you've had that miracle once,  it's very hard to ever imagine something that could top it. I mean how can you settle for broth, knowing what is possible?

I believe that it is possible to top what I've had. But, I also believe FULLY that that is a breath only God can breathe, and I intend to wait for Him to exhale - deeply!  :-)
And so now ,I focus my life on living everyday fully.  My love will not be wasted pineing for something that "once was", or could be "someday".  My "someday" is today-everyday, and my "Prince Charming" is my life yet to be lived.

No day left unlived. And that is my motto for this new year.  I will not die an unlived life.  I have said it before, but again I'm inspired, and whether it be through a blog to express a frustration (example "A"), or whether it be through an amazing audition (like the one I plan to nail tomorrow at noon!). I will not leave any day without so much as just one short breath of life in it. 

I just feel so bad for the girls on that show who think that getting married to "the one" will make their lives complete.  I hate seeing people, even friends I know, who put their lives on hold, and lessen their own personal value, simply because they are yet unmarried.

Life doesn't begin and end with marriage and love. 
It took me 27 years to figure that out....I'm not planning to waste more time.
How about you?

Thursday, January 7, 2010


I'm sure you will recognize this feeling.  You know, when you are sitting in your living room, vegged out on the couch watching a movie just so you have a reason to ignore the dishes in the sink, when something catches your eye.
And there it is.  A bug.  Crawling ever so slowly on the ceiling.  At first it looks like a small very lazy spider (which is not very encouraging, but at least the ceiling is 15 feet up there, so there's little to worry about.)  Second glance is even better because you think it could actually be a fly, which is nothing at all really! 

But alas, it's not as lazy as what you once had thought, and as you watch it crawl across the ceiling with more gusto, dread sets in.  You become concerned for yourself for no good reason.  Because really, who ever died of a domestic bug bite in upstate New York anyway?

Finally, you can't take it anymore, so you go to turn on the overhead lights and grab your glasses.  This is when you are mortified to find that it is not a fly as once hoped.  It is not even the Spider of Doom.  Nope.  This is the, bring sweat to your brow, cousin of the centipede, and it is currently crawling directly above your head!!

Ok. No big deal.  You're an adult.  An adult with wonderfully high ceilings so thats even better!  Watch the movie. 
No good.  Every minute or so your eye wanders back for a quick check on the coordinates of Pete the Pede. 
Then comes the moment where you can no longer see him.  You have absolutely no idea if he is crawling along the beam, or the pipe across your ceiling.  What you REALLY hope is that he didn't just DROP into your lap.  Or worse, your HAIR!. OK, so now every minute you glance at the ceiling, at the floor, at yourself, at the chair next to you. And you realize that the only thing less comforting than knowing you have a nasty bug on your ceiling, is knowing that you once had a nasty bug on your ceiling.

MIA bugs are SO much worse.